Unable to let her pass me whilst looking like that, I grab for her waist and spin her towards the piano. Shrieking, Avery shoves at my shoulders in panic but I settle her on the shiny black surface and hold my hands up in defeat. Guilt burns at me, knowing I’ve brought this reaction on myself and I fucking hate it. Sensing I’m not a threat, Avery eyes me curiously but keeps her posture rigid. Slowly pushing my way between her legs, my erection rests between us, showing the full affect her skimpy nightwear and gaming has had on me.
“You’ve never stopped suffering, have you?” I breathe into her ear, a resulting shiver moving down her spine. Looking deeply into Avery’s vibrant blue eyes, I’m beginning to see how similar we actually are. Like me, she’s a survivor of neglect but is still plagued by the mistreatment of our parents. Dropping my bullshit act for the first time in….I don’t know how long, I hope Avery can find the real me buried deep inside. Because God knows, if there is anything worth seeing still in there, it would be for someone like her.
Sliding a hand around the back of her neck, she tenses further and a fleeting look of worry travels across her face. “Please don’t touch my back,” she whispers, vulnerability taking up residence in her expression. Her words are a dagger to my heart, stabbing deeply and twisting. I helped to add to her pain, I held her while she was tortured all over again.
“Never again,” I promise, my lips brushing across her. I should leave. I’m an asshole that will never be worthy of her. I’ll never be able to heal her in the way she needs. But I also can’t not have her in this moment. I’m selfish like that.